Gym Equipment

I had a thought earlier at the gym today. Not necessarily regarding anything fitness or sport related, but one of the individual. What do people think about when they're trapped on the treadmill/elliptical/etc? Maybe they run off to LaLa Land for distraction or simply watch the tv in front of them. The iPod music only distracts you for so long before it just becomes a beat to pace yourself to. It's always strange how my mind wanders in order to cope with working out. It can go anywhere from "just concentrate on the picture on the wall" to "pretend you're in a race with all these other people."
I hate the urge to look over at other people. It makes me feel awkward when others do it to me. Almost like asking someone how they did on their test really. This spawns the need to compare yourself to them.....perhaps I could say that we all have moments of reverting to selfish childhood here.
Comparing, imagioning, wandering. We're all in the same place but not talking to each other and avoiding eye contact. Looking someone in the eye is too personal here, not sure why. Probably because you're sweaty and don't want the attention drawn to how your shirt looks wet or your makeup has run just enough to make you look exhausted.
I could imagine that depending on the gym-goer, their thoughts may wander in different directions than mine. The musclehead guy, the OC housewife prancing around, the heavy guy working his ass off, tiny asian woman, etc. All could have drastically different scenarios playing out as they work out.
Add needing to wear glasses into this equation and it becomes stranger. I don't work out with them on so my vision becomes a pitfall. At times I end up trying to figure out what the closed captioning on the big tv's are saying. That's a doomed battle for me haha. Reading the other guy's shirt is hard enough! The worst is recognizing people at the gym--or them recognizing me rather. I can't see the detail of someone's face til they're 4 feet away.
Anyways, it's been a long day. Goodnight.

Getting Back Into It

I need to get back to yoga classes. But I was so frustrated last time I went by the instructor. Yea, I go to the classes at 24 Hour Fitness but still I expect a good yoga teacher as I've had many times. I need to drag a friend along with me to go the first few times so I'm accountable to having to go instead of making excuses in my head n just going back to sleep.

It's ironic that I fell off the yoga wagon after the most stressful event of my life (my mom's heart attack a few months ago). In a way it shot my motivation for doing things while it made me sit and stare at the lake for a good 2 hours. Funny how a sudden appreciation for little things makes you completely zone out n fall inwards. Even though she was fine, it still knocked me on my ass enough. At least we were on vacation, I don't think I would've handled social situations very well. I did become irritable about little things like my boyfriend's step-dad making comments to my dad about putting mayo on his sandwich. Of course my dad can stand up for himself and told him to fuck off right in front of me. Concern for myself had completely drained from my mind after those few days at the lake. As usual my focus became taking care of everyone else, the typical female job. I shutdown for the most part, just my blank face with eyes shut as I laid on the balcony swing. Listening to the crickets and the water was the closest to relaxation I'd get. My last yoga session by myself was the previous day. It was nice, with a view even. Now that I think about it, my motivation was zapped and that's what needs to be built up again.

I'm not a naturally athletic person, never have been and never will be. But as I've spoken about in previous posts, I'm now trying to spend time on doing things that are good for me whether its what I eat or working out. I need me-time sometimes, though I do enjoy taking care of the people I love. I don't enjoy being a personal reminder system or a maid, etc...blah blah blah. And so I'm looking for rewarding things for ME.

My goal for the month has been to start running, which is going well so far. I've put the headphones on and ran, not far but its the act of going for it that counts. Generally past the pool and down the trail through the neighborhood and back through the dog park to my house. Simple really. Hopefully this next month I can get myself to a yoga class too. Perhaps Sunday mornings, though the Sunday instructors are always such....they favor the beginners too much. I don't want to "stretch" my feet for five minutes. That's a waste of the hour if you ask me. I want to show up and engage myself throughout the class. Not pussy out with beginner exercises.

It would be nice to get back to the point where I can comfortably do my own routine at home. But that took awhile to do. I downloaded yoga position apps for my phone, bought a book all about the poses and working through a routine day by day. Somehow I had become obsessed with it. Most likely because I was getting me-time in a room full of people that were looking for the same thing--concentration and a peaceful hour that's all about you. Gaining flexibility and a noticeable difference in my core were the cherry on top.

Let's see if I can do this. Being that the spring school semester starts on Tuesday for me will ad a challenge. Homework on top of work, on top of goals. Winter break has been dull and full of working so I welcome back classes, lectures, and things to think about. I can manage if I really try.

2010 Resolutions

This is probably a bit of a belated New Years resolution post but hey, gotta do it before January is over! This month may end up going by fast since Winter Break ends tomorow. Boo! But yay for school....yes? Alright! So let's do this thing.

2010 Resolutions

1. Drink more water.

This seems simple enough right? But for me I tend to go with juice or soda more often. Like many people, I'm a soda addict which is bad for my waistline, bloating, and the health of my teeth. So why not put in some effort to drink more water? We're all made of 70% water anyways. It's great for my skin and my mood. Everybody likes having nicely hydrated skin!

2. Go to the gym....no seriously, just go.

I don't particularly like going though I should. I've started going twice a week since Christmas and I've noticed that I feel better. A bit more energy and a happier feeling. Endorphins! I feel much more confident in myself when I go regularly.

3. Pass Math 8.

As most my friends and family know, math is not my strong point. This semester I'll be taking my final math class in college, and I aim to pass it the first time. So let's batten down the hatches and put in some more study time and effort. I may hate math, but this is the home stretch and I wanna be done with it forever as soon as possible. I took Math 253 fuckin four times, this class MUST go better.

These are all self-oriented goals because I can do them all. Mainly I want to feel healthier, I want to feel better. I'm not fat, or even near being overweight for my BMI, but I want to be in better shape. I find that sometimes I lack confidence because of feeling fat, so why not get rid of the fat feeling by going to the gym? That works. My skin gets all nasty and dry from my eczema, drink more water and put some lotion on it....though that doesn't cure it, it does help a bit. In my opinion (and most self-help gurus'), I can't help anyone else unless I help myself first. So my health and emotional/confidence will be put first this year.

I won't sit there and complain that I feel fat. Or complain that my skin is bleeding because its dry (sorry I know that's gross). I can fix things, or at least help them. For my body's sake, MY body. Why else would I make these resolutions? Haha knowing that my ass is rock hard is a bonus.